Quitting

I officially quit the job that sucked my soul yesterday. Even though I haven't set foot near my office since June and I've been working at my very awesome new job for almost a whole month, I didn't really have complete closure. I'm glad I waited to quit. I certainly enjoyed my bus pass all summer and as it turns out I will get to enjoy my insurance through the month of September. As I walked onto campus, I felt really awkward about the whole thing, like they would be pissed at me for not giving them more than two weeks notice or like I might have to defend or explain my decision. I was ready to say everything I haven't said, but in truth we all know why I'm leaving. I'm not really the one to keep it all hidden inside. In the end however, it was nothing like that anyway.

My boss who has made my working life somewhat miserable at times, greeted me with a smile. Then, as he invited me to sit down he asked "Well, will you be returning to us this year?" To which I said no. He asked me if I had found something else and I told him about my new position and then he effusive told me how happy hee was for me. He wished me the best. I gave him my keys and my bus pass and I was out.

It was weird, very anticlimatic, but in a good way. I am trying to think of the last time I quit something. I quit the cello in the fifth grade. I quit the guitar after my friend passed away. I quit UPS to move to Japan. But most of the hard stuff, school and whatnot, I've stuck with. And even that crappy job, I held onto it like I had no options for the longest time, when it was really making me miserable. How do you know when to quit? And then how do you do so without feeling like a failure. I feel like I failed at my crappy job. I wished I could have taken it and made it work, but then another part of me really doesn't care if I failed or not, but is just relieved that I escaped. But now I am wondering what is the next thing I'll quit and how it will impact me. Enough for now, it is a beautiful day and I have to go to tae kwon do.