My Grandma

My grandma and I have this quirky relationship. She once asked me about the rain in Seattle. I told her all about my fabulous hooded coats and how much I despise umbrellas. Everytime it rains, short people mercilessly stab at my eyes. People with umbrellas are constantly intruding on my personal space bubble and it's very irritating. In response to my diatribe, she bought me an umbrella for my birthday. "Well, you didn't have one," she said when I looked at her in disbelief.

My grandma is the kind of person who gives you what she wants you to have, regardless of whether or not you want it. The same goes for advise. She has been pestering me to get a proper teaching certificate and a PhD...like I can just go do that. I mean, I'm still paying off my MA, and unless Ed McMan has a check for me, I'll be paying it off for a while. Also grad school was kind of traumatic for me. I don't know that I want to go through all that again. But she is persistent.

Recently my grandma got sick. She really gave us a scare. We may bicker, we not agree on a multitude of things, but she is the matriarch of my family and I love and respect her. She was a teacher in Iowa when barely any black folks did that. She went on to be a teacher of teachers...so I guess it's hereditary. She is also the person who taught me to cook. We spent many family holidays in the kitchen together. At first I would just sit somewhere out of the way and peel potatoes or dice onions, but as we've both gotten older, she is the one sitting and peeling while I stuff the turkey and prepare the main meal. Mostly we just watch Oprah together or play rummie, but sometimes she tells me about her mother and her grandmothers. She is the keeper of our stories, my family history. I've made video tapes of her speaking, but I know that once she is gone there will be a huge hole in the tapestry of my family.

I am also worried for the rest of my family. My grandfather passed away when I was little, so when my grandma goes, my mother, as the oldest born becomes the head of our family. Then what, what happens when it is my turn to take care of my mom? I don't have brothers and sisters and so far I don't have any children. I am only really close to my grandma, my parents and my aunt. I know it's morbid to think about, but what happens if I'm left alone? Well, for now, my grandma is doing much better. She has plenty of energy left to make me crazy.